Last week we talked about the importance of NOT being SUPERWOMAN (or Superman for our awesome guy readers out there). Read more to find out if you have a “Superwoman Complex.”
Today I am going to share a few insights about how I got over my Superwoman complex. I would also LOVE to hear any thoughts and ideas you have about how to move past this.
1. Acknowledge you have a problem. “Hi I’m Charity and I have a superwoman complex….” You many never be sent to a therapy group for your superwomen complex, but maybe you should! Its important to talk with a trusted Christian friend about your struggle. Take your cape off, and let a friend know that the cares of other people are weighing you down and you need their help. A friend can be a sounding board for situations and also an encouragement. Ask them to tell you this simple phrase “Charity, its going to be ok, you are not responsible for the choices and actions of others.”
2. Read! The best book I have read about maintaining emotionally and physically healthy boundaries is called Boundaries, written by two Christian Psychologists, Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend.
It absolutely revolutionized my world, and I consider it a must read for anyone with a gift of mercy or anyone involved in ministry or a helping profession. Do you have any good book recommendations on this subject? Please share with us!
3. Understanding God’s heart for us! I have spent a lot of time meditating on this verse, it is a powerful scripture (especially for those of us who have a hard time taking our capes off) and I encourage you to do the same!
Matthew 11:28-30 “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.”
What does this scripture speak to your heart?
4. Lay it down at the cross. Take a moment to think about the cross. I mean to really consider what happened at the cross. It was even more than Jesus dying and taking every sin upon Himself so that when we believe in Him and accept Him as Lord of our lives we get to spend eternity with Him in heaven.
John 11:25 “Jesus said to her, ‘I am the resurrection and the life. The one who believes in me will live, even though they die.”
YES! This is a REALLY BIG part of the work of the cross and an extremely important part because without it Satan would have every legal right to demand our lives as payment for our sin. The cross and the empty tomb are the ABSOLUTE FINISHING WORK AND VICTORY over EVERY sin, fear, sickness, disease, tragedy and death.
1 Corinthians 1: 18, 30 “For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God. It is because of him that you are in Christ Jesus, who has become for us wisdom from God—that is, our righteousness, holiness and redemption. “
This means that when Jesus said “IT IS FINISHED!” that wasn’t just a dramatic climatic phrase. He literally meant it is done and completed! Wow! That is so freeing! It means that I know the ONE who can save anyone from anything. It means that the same God who triumphed over every evil scheme of the enemy that was and will come lives inside me!
So after reflecting upon what the cross and empty grave mean I imagine every person and situation sitting at the foot of the cross. And then I ask myself…”Charity, is the cross and empty grave enough for this situation?” and I also ask, “Jesus are you enough for this situation?” The answer is YES, of course, EVERYTIME! But there is a difference between knowing that the right answer is Yes, and sitting with Jesus and taking the time to hear from Him what His truth is over the situation.
Psalm 16:6 “the boundry lines have fallen for me in pleasant places, surely I have a delightful inheritance.”
If we don’t know what those boundary lines are it is hard to resonate with this verse. That is why I cannot emphasize enough the importance of talking to God about what your boundary lines should be, for the day, week, month, or season of life. It is as simple as asking, “Lord, I have been asked to serve in ABC ministry do you want me to?” or “Lord, my friend is really struggling right now and I know they have great need, how do you want me to love them?” Then wait for His answer. Ask other trusted believers to also pray with you. I have found such confidence comes from taking time and humbling my heart to ask the Lord how to spend my resources of time, energy and money. When I am confident that I am in His boundary lines it is also a lot easier for me to lay my cape aside and not feel like I have to solve every problem that I see.
As we conclude the series on Sabbath I would love to hear your thoughts! Has this series inspired you to make a change in any way?